Thursday, May 21, 2015

Mother's Day is Stressful Part One

Warning:  This post was supposed to be a light touching on why MD was stressful and then move on to show you what I made for the mother's in the church and pics of my kids swimming and climbing trees.  I am warning you right now that, instead, this turned into some sort of therapy session psychobabble that I apparently had on my heart and mind for a couple weeks now that has had me in this mood I'm in.  Oops.  LOL  Proceed with caution, and you'd better pull up a chair.  It's lengthy!  I will do a part 2 with the lighter mood.

I don't think I ever actually posted about Mother's Day, did I?  I feel like I've been a slacker blogger for the last little while.  I am in some sort of FUNK and I don't even know why!!!  I think it all started around Mother's Day, honestly.

I'll just be honest and say I feel like such a failure as a mother.  I just do.  Back before going on Wellbutrin, I really got angry a lot.  Over little, unimportant things.  I think back to times I have blown up at the kids and made them cry and it breaks my heart.  I mean, it does still happen.  I'm human. They're human.  We all have good days and bad days (me and them!!! lol).  Now when it happens, though, it's because they really have pushed me to my wits end.  It's not over something petty.  I read on the news yesterday where a mother choked her son until he passed out.  I think he was 15... or 12.  Can't remember for sure.  But do you know why?  She started yelling at him in a fit of rage because he was doing his chore of picking up dog poop that day instead of THE DAY AFTER.  So he hadn't NOT done his job.  He apparently overdid his job, probably trying to please her, and still managed to really upset her.  <sigh>  Well, I didn't choke or physically harm any of my kids, but I did feel like I was ridiculously demanding if that makes sense.  I dunno.  My husband wasn't a fan of meds in the antidepressants/antianxiety category for years.  Now he has seen Wellbutrin make a difference in my attitude, so he says he does see that some people probably do need help with issues.  I guess sometimes you have to be the one going through something before you can really know how you feel about an issue.

So as Mother's Day was approaching, the kids made me a card at the gym daycare telling me what a great mom I was.  My youngest daughter constantly writes, "I love you, Mom.  You are the best Mom I ever had" (ha) on her notepad at church, throws her arms around my arm, and smiles up at me.  Middle daughter is such a trying kid yet writes me little notes all the time doting on me for various things like meals I cook or for homeschooling her or doing certain things for her.  Oldest daughter always wants to be with me, and my son loves me to bits.

Instead of these things making me feel super happy, they bring guilt.  A story from my childhood:  I have a nephew just less than 2 years younger than me.  He would come to our house quite a bit when we were kids.  We were more like siblings rather than aunt and nephew.  My dad had planted some rose bushes out in the front yard.  They were beautiful.  My nephew and I had the idea to give the roses to my mom, yanno... to make her happy.  Being little kids, we didn't cut the stem and all.  We just took the actual flower part off the bush.  We presented those to my mom and she was very, very angry that we had "ruined" her flowers. She lamented the fact that she couldn't even put them in a vase and enjoy them because we hadn't cut stems, just flowers.  My mom spanked me for that.  Mom told my nephew's mom when she picked him up, and she didn't think a thing of it.  He didn't get in any kind of trouble.

That story told, my mom feels terrible about that.  After the fact, she realized I was just a little kid doing what I thought would please my mom.  She brought the story up not too long ago herself.  She told me how much that has bothered her.  Now that I'm a mom, I do realize that sometimes things get so stressful that we react instead of thinking of things through our kids' eyes.  I try really hard to look at things through my kids' eyes. They definitely do see things differently, don't they?  LOL  Sometimes, though, I fail and react.

All I could think of coming up on Mother's Day was that my kids were praising me and I didn't deserve it.  I was thinking of all the stories they will remember years later about their mom, just like I have negative memories of my mom.  My husband thinks I really don't see things correctly.  I will admit that lately, honest to goodness, nearly every time we are in public someone comes over and compliments us on our "well-behaved children."  We mostly get this at restaurants because the kids enjoy sitting at their own table.  We will sit next to them at our own table.  The kids stay seated (for the most part), use their manners with the waitress, and don't cause a ruckus.  There are times when we have even been embarrassed, thinking they were bad (son is LOUD like his mama) when someone will walk over to us and say how impressed they are.  Then we just look at each other and laugh because I guess what is bad to us is still well behaved to others!!!  He always tells me that I am really the one who has taught and trained the kids because I am with them the most and that when people compliment them, they are really complimenting me.

In my mind, I just think of kids running around at home, sibling rivalries, wild playing, a messy house, mounds of laundry, a sink full of dishes, school papers that need graded or corrected or filed.  I see that as failure.  In reality, that is just LIFE.  I know that.  I really do.  I just need to get over the messes!  I used to be one who would have a fit and clean from top to bottom before we had company.  Now, though, I realize that probably makes my mother friends feel like failures.  I know it does me when I go to a perfect home.  So I clean up messes but leave things NORMAL.  I don't hound my family to get things "perfect" and make them wish we weren't even having company.  I have received more relieved sighs from fellow mothers that my house wasn't perfect than I ever did compliments when I did major cleaning!  No one wants to feel like they are the only one, yanno?  My friends can sit and talk with me about how things just can't be perfectly in order and clean while raising kids, especially not while homeschooling and them always being here.  We have fun.  We talk. We feel sorry for each other.  Haha

Mother's Day morning, I woke up to a long text from my husband.  He doesn't really text.  Takes him forever.  Lol  So this was a big deal.  But his text only depressed me.  He told me something to the effect of, "I remember when we had no children and it was your heart's desire to be a mom.  You are a wonderful mom to our 4 children. I'm glad God answered your prayers."  So sweet.  But that morning, it just made me feel so guilty!!!  Then I got up to a homemade sign on the kitchen wall that the kids had made telling me what a great mom I was.  I thanked them and hugged them.  Then I saw the UNBELIEVABLE mess in the younger two kids' room and all the dishes in the sink and just felt sour.  I felt GUILTY.  I felt guilty for the messes bothering me!!!

My main issue with self hatred is the guilt that I feel from hating messes and sibling arguments and toys laying all over after everything has just been cleaned (and they do clean their own rooms and have chores around here).  I prayed for these children.  Children come with messes and arguments and responsibilities.  They don't remain cooing babies with chubby cheeks and toothless grins forever, yanno?  I mean, duh!  That sounds so simple, but that's why people say, "We want to have a baby!!!"  No one says, "We want to have a pre-teen with hormones and eyes that roll at you" or "I want a little boy to pee off the front porch without me knowing and get me arrested" or "Oh, I can't wait until one day when I can step of Lego's at 3 am!"  LOL

But I do love my kids.  More than anything.  Even more than  a clean house.  My heart aches when I read news stories like this past week where a 5-year-old boy was killed at his birthday party by a guest who was leaving as he tried to retrieve his new baseball out from under their van.  And my mind can't handle all the "what ifs" when another child has been found dead after an abduction.  I want to punch someone's lights out (Wellbutrin or not!!!) when I hear of someone physically abusing an innocent child!  I might get upset with my kids, but don't you dare mess with them!

I'm trying to force myself to realize that I am enough to my kids.  They love me.  They know I'm not perfect.  I tell them when I'm in the wrong.  They are getting older and can tell on their own when I'm wrong.  I always end up going back and apologizing when I have overreacted.  Sometimes it is they who have to apologize to me for their actions.  I do have bad memories from childhood, but I also have good ones!  I still call my parents nearly every single day.  I don't hate them.  I LOVE THEM.  I don't need to let my own feelings of unworthiness block out the love that is being offered to me by these four balls of stress and joy all rolled into one!!!!

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

No Flip Egg, IRS, and 3 Pounds

I feel like I have been going, going, going for several weeks now!  I'll sit down to blog, but then I just don't because there are 20 other things I'm trying to get done on the computer while I have the chance.  I'm going to take a little time to share some stuff with you while hubby has the kids doing their Bible time and prayer together!

First off, I started following A Pinch of Healthy a good while back.  This lady is a fellow southerner, so I immediately felt connected.  Ha!  Love to hear her Georgia twang.  :)  Well, she shared a video the other day about how she cooks the perfect egg that requires NO flipping!  I always mess my eggs up and bust the yolk once I start flipping them over.  It's a bummer when you are wanting a runny egg.  So this morning, I decided to try her method.  Love it!!!

I'm not allowed to use spray on my skillets, so I put in a tad of coconut oil instead of spray.  I cooked 2 eggs at once, so I used 1 TBSP of water instead of tsp when it was time to add the water.  I overcooked my 2 eggs. They were gorgeous but not runny at all.  My daughter made 2 in the same skillet for her and her brother once I was done.  I warned her to keep an eye on her eggs.  Hers came out perfectly runny.  I have to say I'm impressed with this low-stress method of making my eggs.  Be sure to check out her blog and watch this video!

Did I tell you all that a very professional message was left on my answering machine one day about a month or so ago saying it was the IRS?  If not, that did happen to me.  It sounded so authentic, but I knew the IRS wouldn't contact me via phone.  I was told that this was a final attempt to settle a debt that I owed to the IRS and that if I didn't pay they would be pressing charges.  When I got home, the number on the caller ID actually even said IRS.  I called the number back, and a man with a thick, foreign accent answered, "Hello, IRS speaking."  You could hear all kinds of people in the background like it was a big call center.  So I said, "Oh, okay.  YEAH RIGHT!" and hung up on him.  Lol  They've never called me since.  I reported the incident to a local police officer.  He said it was indeed a scam and that he would put the info on the police department's fb page.

Well, while in KY on Saturday, the pastor announced that so-and-so's middle-aged daughter-in-law had received this same phone call and fell dead of a heart attack from fear while on the phone with the person!!!!  HOW AWFUL!  The woman was like in her 50s.  They said they were threatening her, trying to get her to give them her info to pay the debt right then to avoid jail time.  She kept saying, "I know I paid that debt!  I know I did.  I sold two calves to pay for that debt!"   Then she fell over and died.  :(  I wonder if she sold the calves to pay a fake debt that they had already called her about and decided to call again since she gave them money the first time.  Regardless, this is sad, sick, and horrible!  Beware of scammers!

This past Friday at Publix higi station, I was down 3 pounds from the last time I weighed (which was either 1 or 1-1/2 weeks before).  I was pleasantly surprised. Their scale has proven to be very accurate over the past 2 years.  I am still following The Diet Alternative on a mostly regular basis.  I have never been able to apply the principles of the book for more than 4 days per week because things have been so crazy or I have allowed excuses to come in.  But I feel like I am getting more control towards food for sure!  I have been able to say no to desserts, stop in the middle of desserts, and even bring a to-go box home from the Mexican place.  That is so not me.  I have felt less bloated, stuffed, and miserable lately than I can ever remember.

I am still going to the gym at least 3 days a week.  I really want to go 4-5 days, but at least I am consistently getting in my 3 days.  Since my arm is doing soooo much better, I finally got on the ellipitical again today.  It's been at least 2 months!  I only did 6 minutes and burned 64 calories, but I really could've went a few minutes more.  I wasn't "dying" yet.  Lol  I was anxious to get over to some of the leg machines, though.  I just lost momentum when my arm got injured, so I even stopped using leg machines.  Today, I did the leg press and the hip adductor.  I was also going to do the abductor, but a man was on it and didn't seem to be getting off any time soon.  So I just went over to the treadmill instead and did 18 minutes with various inclines.  I burned right around 220 calories on just the machines, not counting weights.  I don't think I should start arm weights again yet, though.

I am definitely loving my new exercise skirt with attached leggings from Kosher Casual.  A friend of mine got herself one and loves it, too!  Also, another friend of mine already owned two and had nothing but good to say about them.  :)  If anyone is interested, here it is.

In the morning, I am going to go swimming with the kids.  I'm praying that lady won't be in the pool since we are going on a different day.  LOL   We will get showered and dressed at the pool and then go on over to the homeschool picnic they are having tomorrow.  We have to leave there after 2 hours to go get haircuts.  I have had this same hairstyle for 2 years now.  I'm bored with it.  I'm wanting to get a cut but not too short.  I'd like a stacked look but a long one.  I've googled and snapped some cell phone shots of the styles I like.  I hate when you go to get your hair cut and end up getting wayyyy shorter hair than you planned!  Hubby never believes me when that happens.  Lol  With all this going on, tomorrow is a no-school day, and the kids are very excited about that!

Oh, I waxed my own upper lip tonight!  It was hilarious!  I bought some wax for sensitive skin at Sally's that a friend recommended.  I just can't keep paying $8 for my lip and an extra $8 for my brows!  I may ruin my brows, but I can handle ripping hair off my lip.  Ha!  The wax was a bright blue, which was weird to me!  I had to microwave it until it got to a certain consistency.  I followed the lip directions perfectly.  When it was time to rip the wax off (this kind doesn't need strips), I just couldn't bring myself to do it!  Lol  I got so tickled that I was crying from laughing!  I walked into the living room, and when the kids saw me everyone was laughing.  Haha  Oldest daughter volunteered to rip the wax from my lip.  I held my skin tight and she yanked with all her might and the wax came tearing off.  It hurt but not as bad as I feared.  I went back to the bathroom to investigate.  Phooey!  I still had a 'stache on one side.  Lol  I was able to do that part all by myself and even waxed one stray eyebrow hair.  I'm not going to do my own eyebrows, but I am at least hoping I can use the wax to extend my eyebrow wax out by getting strays.  The wax only cost me $6-something after tax, and it looks like it'll last me about 3 times.  It will probably last longer as I get used to it and don't paint 5 gallons of wax on my lip per time!  :)

Well, thanks for tuning in to this edition of all the random things that go on in my life.  Lol  Have a great week, everyone!

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Women's Health Week

I personally didn't even know there was such a thing as Women's Health Week, but a lady from Oscar Insurance contacted me and asked me if I would share some guidelines for women on my blog that their company has put together.  I agreed.  I think it would make a great fridge magnet or bookmark!

While I personally don't agree with all the vaccinations recommended, I do think this is a handy guide to knowing what tests and check-ups you should have and when.  I have put this in as "extra large," but it is hard to see!  You can click the image, save it, and then zoom in to read it.  That's what I had to do.  It's a neat thing to read, so I'm sorry I can't get it any bigger for posting!

I don't personally know anything about this company, but if you are in the New York or New Jersey area and would like to know more just click here for NY or click here for NJ.  I am told that Oscar has tools like their mobile app and Misfit rewards program that allow their members to really keep track of their health. On their app they have a customer care service with nurses and medical professionals on call for any health questions.  There's even a "Doctor on Call" service where you can talk to your talk doctor directly through the app without having to make an appointment or head to the doctors.  Wouldn't that be a time saver?!

I hope all my fellow women out there have a great, healthy week!  :)  I have been super busy since Saturday, but I plan to do a post soon about Mother's Day weekend and also a true, scary story I heard on Saturday while in KY!

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Same Old Chaos

I just had a free and peaceful moment (everyone is outside but me!!!), so I thought I'd do a blog post.  My arm had continued to improve.  I had 2 days of steroids left.  After answering quite a few texts in a row this morning, I started having some pain again.  I took an Aleve (my first in a few days) and iced my arm and the pain went away.  I hope this actually resolves and isn't something that keeps coming back repeatedly.

Tuesday morning, I woke the kids up early so we could swim at the indoor pool together.  They were so excited.  I make sure to obey the rules and only go with the kids during times labeled family swim or open swim.  When we got there, there was one lady in the pool.  She was an older lady, and I immediately felt nervous because she didn't look happy to see us come in.  I mean, I can't blame her.  She was all alone in a big pool not getting her hair wet and here come 4 kids.  LOL  Before the kids got in, I called them over to me and said, "Y'all try not to splash this lady, okay?"  After hearing yes ma'am from all four, my oldest daughter JUMPS into the pool. Oy.  She didn't think anything of it because she was far away from the lady.  But oldest daughter makes quite the splash when she jumps in.  She has all my graces.  :)  When she went in, the woman's nose snarled in disdain and she rudely said, "PLEASE don't splash!" and stared a hole through me!

My other three kids were heading down the pool stairs at that moment and stopped dead in their tracks.  This scenario immediately sucked all the joy out of the current moment.  I dunno.  It just really got to me.  Oldest daughter is THE most respectful of my children, and I know for a fact she thought she was far enough away or wouldn't have jumped in after being told not to splash.  Mama Bear rose up in me.  I calmly but firmly and politely said, "She's just jumping in ma'am.  It's open swim time."  Boy did I get a look then!!!  She stared at me, so I just kept my eyes even with hers but with a smile on my face willing myself to not get upset!!!

The lady turned her back to me and headed to the pool steps.  Ugh.  I was honestly relieved to see her go, but I felt bad, too.  This is a public pool.  She could easily come during the adult only swim times  if it's that important to her not to get her hair and makeup wet just like I only come during family/open swim times.  My kids splash when they swim and don't even know it because when they are kicking their legs come up.  I guarantee I would've been a nervous wreck had she stayed.  I do wish she had nicely asked me about the splashing, though, and not been hateful.  I hate confrontations!

About an hour later, another older lady came in.  She was very friendly and spoke to us.  I remember talking with her some last year.  She just went about swimming her laps and minding her own business.  About 15 minutes after she came, I told her we were going to get on out of her way and let her enjoy the pool.  I figured the pool would start jumpin' any minute anyway because it was just 30 minutes until Silver Sneakers water aerobics class would start.

After swimming, it took forever to get us all showered and dressed and hair dried and fixed.  Whew!  We had some lunch out because we had doctor's appointments in 1 hour.  Middle daughter somehow bruised her big toe, had eczema all behind her ear, and has either vitiligo or tinea versicolor all around one part of her neck extending down her shoulder.  Son has a wart on his pointer finger that never went away, got bigger, and had just spread into 3 other little warts in different places.  Ew.  Lol  We were the first appointment after lunch hour, so we got called straight back.  That was nice.  After that long of a day, we came home and did a day's worth of school.  I was beat and with every right to be.  Lol

I was really low emotionally on Tuesday.  I was very down and hard on myself.  The pool encounter only made me question myself more.  I don't even want to go into everything that was getting to me, but it's just normal, everyday stuff that most people deal with anyway.

To top off the evening, son got a migraine during supper.  Bless his heart!  He will finally go to the neurologist on the 27th, but I don't really know what good it will do.  His migraines are sleep pattern related.  Middle daughter was so excited about swimming that morning that she woke him up out of a dead sleep at 7:30 am.  YOU CAN'T WAKE HIM LIKE THAT!!!  I have found that if we are at a church meeting or something where you are kept out really late and then have to be back the next morning early, if you have to wake him without letting him wake himself, if he has a rough night's sleep, he is gonna get a migraine.  So it happened during supper.  He was trying so hard not to let it get him down.  He had a "real baseball game" planned with his daddy in the backyard.  He had looked forward to it all day.  We even all had ice cream in a cone after supper.  He got just a few bites of his in when he burst into tears, begging to be taken to the doctor because "it's the worst one I ever had."

I feel extra sympathy for parents of children with horrible diseases that they deal with every day.  It is so hard just to deal with the pain and tears from the migraines!  You feel so bad for your child but there's really nothing you can do.  :(  I gave him some ibuprofen and a hot rag for his forehead.  He wants to cling onto me when he has a migraine.  I stayed with him until he fell asleep.  I'm so thankful that sleep cures his!  He slept the rest of the night from almost 7:00 pm on.

At 2:30 am, he woke my husband up.  "Daddy.  DADDY!!!  I want my ice cream cone now.  I'm better!"  Hahaha  Bless his heart.  That was the last thing he remembered and he thought we put his partially eaten cone in the freezer.  :)  Hubby sent him back to bed, but I have to admit to giving him his ice cream cone at breakfast.

Wednesday we took Elderly Lady to her gym class.  I walked the treadmill at a higher speed and level than usual.  I burned 202 calories in 28 minutes.  Somehow *I* ended up with a headache on Wednesday evening!  It's nothing like a migraine.  I was still able to cook supper, function,and drive us to church.  But the pain wasn't letting up.  I sat in the Sunday School room during service because the singing and preaching just got to me.  I went to bed just about as soon as we got home and am fine today.  I rarely ever get a headache.  I'm not sure if it was stress, lack of sleep, the steroids, or what.

We just hung around the house and rested today, well except for schooling.  I slept in.  The kids slept in.  The kids had some playtime in the yard between school lessons.  I am loving all this sunshine but I wish someone would zap the stinkin' carpenter bees!  They are so annoying and intimidating.  They are like the bully of all bees.  Lol

After making some changes on Wednesday and Thursday, I have felt much better.  I'm glad because it's no fun to be depressed and down on yourself!

This has turned out to be very long and of no real meaning other than telling you about my past couple of days.  Lol  Regardless, I enjoy writing out all of my feelings and thoughts.  I plan to go to the gym in the morning then to the park to meet with some friends for a cookout.  Saturday we will be traveling to KY for a meeting and come back that evening.  I hope everyone has a great Mother's Day weekend!

Monday, May 4, 2015

Sweet Relief

So I've mentioned my arm injury at the gym by putting too much weight on one arm.  I have been in CONSTANT pain since.  I have been living off ibuprofen switched up with Aleve since then.  When I tried to go without it, the pain was too severe.  Taking those kinds of meds consistently, though, can damage your stomach.   I just felt like I couldn't win for losing!

Every time I felt like my arm would be getting better, I would somehow aggravate it again and go back to constant pain.  Opening a bottle lid, holding a pen, typing too long, pushing the aerosol hairspray trigger, and even brushing my teeth caused bad pain.  I was trying to just ignore and live with the pain, but it was unable to be ignored.  Also, I was becoming quite the grouch!

When I woke up Sunday morning still in pain, I was annoyed.  I decided I would go to the walk-in clinic between church services.  I do have a PA-C in town here that I'm established with, but I am so busy during the week with schooling and regular duties.  Plus, it's never fun to take 4 kids to the doctor's office with you, even if they are on their best behavior.

I just couldn't get this pain off my mind, and I started trying to remember WHEN this happened to me.  During a song, I grabbed out my cell phone and opened the calendar function.  I scrolled back until I found that I last visited my doctor on March 12th.  At that time, I told him it had been at least 2 to 3 weeks since my injury.  That meant this injury happened the last week in February, possibly even the week before that!  I slipped my phone back into my purse and felt very resolved that I wasn't putting this off any longer

After fixing lunch for the family, eating, and preparing baked beans and brownies for that night's church cookout, I headed out.  Thankfully, only 2 people were ahead of me and got called back as soon as I was seated in the lobby.  I only had to wait about 10 minutes before it was my turn.  I had to face that dreaded scale immediately after eating lunch.  Wish I would've timed THAT differently!  Lol  I explained to the nurse and then to the PA what was going on.  She decided to take an x-ray just to be sure there were no fractures.  She also did some strength resistance tests and found the main point of pain and all the points or radiation.

After finding no issues on x-ray and saying she didn't expect to, she told me that I had all the classic symptoms of tennis elbow (or lateral epicodylitis).  She said my PA-C was right to tell me just to take the anti-inflammatory drugs.  It's the first step in healing.  Now, though, it's been too long.  I was given a shot of steroids in the hip (BOY DID THAT BURNNNN) and will take oral steroids beginning today until I make it through my pack.  I also have to wear a wrist stabilizing brace to keep those tendons still and rested.  I do take it off some, like now to type, but I try to wear it most all of the time.  I'm supposed to pick up some tennis elbow band from Walmart, too.  I forgot to tell hubby to get that this morning when he got my prescription.  Oops.

I can honestly say that within 30 minutes of the shot, I was experiencing some relief.  The real test was when I woke up this morning.  I sleep all curled up at night.  Every morning, straightening my arm for the first time was EXCRUCIATING.  This morning, no pain!  I still have a tad of pain with full extension or certain motions but NOTHING like before.  Whoopeee!!!  I never even thought of steroid shots!  I feel so dumb for waiting so long now.  Why didn't you all tell me?!  :)  Ha!  And the entire visit, including x-ray and shot, was only $107.  That is less than I expected, and I'm glad it was affordable.

Saturday morning, I went to the Old Timer's Day parade with my family.  I felt miserable though.  Between TOM and my arm getting on my last nerve, my husband dropped me off at home afterwards to nap and be grouchy while he and the kids did some grocery shopping for me.  I am feeling much more myself today.  And honestly, when I'm at my worst life just feels overwhelming.  All these riots and unrest and fatal car wrecks and murders and kidnappings and the shape of our world in general just really gets to me.  It weighs on my mind.  I get so sick of hearing about it all.  I wish none of it were true.  I look at my kids and it scares me for them and their future.  So Saturday was just a day where a million different things were coming down on me mentally.  I needed the time alone and the extra rest.  I'm glad I have a husband who can tell when I need that and is happy to make sure I get it when possible.

Well, my arm is feeling the burn of all this typing.  I'm gonna hush!  We are having the best weather here! It stinks to still be doing school!!!  hehe  Well, responsibilities are responsibilities.  Better get off here and make our day happen!

Thursday, April 30, 2015

My Week

I really didn't mean to disappear for the majority of the week.  It's just been a really busy week for me with lots of company and running around.

Tuesday, a fellow homeschool mom and her two kids came over to spend about 3 hours with us.  It was a nice break from our normal day.  That evening, we went to eat with some friends of ours.  The man is battling lymphoma cancer.  He was in the area to receive some testing or treatments from Vanderbilt.  Since my house was about as clean as it seems to get these days, I told my husband to invite them to our house after eating so we could all talk.  We met these people in Indiana about 4 years ago.  Hubby and I both really like them.  My son had a blast with their son.  My son is 6 and theirs is 14, but he plays wide open just like my son.  LOL  It's probably a good thing for all of us that the weather was nice enough for them to be OUTSIDE to play.  :)

Wednesday morning, I picked up Elderly Lady (the 85yo I pick up for church) at 8:50 and took her to her first-ever Silver Sneakers class.  I was so excited I got all 5 of us out the door in time to get her!  I got her all settled in and introduced her to another lady there.  I explained that it was her first time.  The other lady grabbed two 1 pound weights for her.  I brought a chair over and got her small exercise ball.  Then I left her in class while I walked 1.34 miles on the treadmill with random hills.  I burned 202 calories.  After showering and getting ready, I found Elderly Lady out at one of the tables.  She told me all about this sweetheart in class who introduced herself and got her chair and everything for her!!!  Lol   I didn't tell her otherwise.  She often talks about how much she despises getting old and forgetful and how she hates that she is no longer allowed to drive.

After dropping Elderly Lady off, I invited a friend of mine and her 16-month-old granddaughter over to visit.  Yanno, since the house was at its cleanest.  And this lady cleans houses for a living.  LOL  Sad to say, we realized we hadn't visited since her grandbaby was 5 months old!  Wow.  Time slips by so fast.  While she was here, one of my neighbors knocked on the door.  I invited her in, too.  She stayed for nearly 30 minutes visiting.  She never comes over.  I guess this was just the week for me to have company!

Wednesday night was church and I was beat when I got home.  I yawned all the way to Elderly Lady's house.  Whew!  I went to bed by 11:30 and fell straight to sleep.  Today was a beautiful day, and I somehow managed to do nothing with it but stay in the house all day!  I made sure the kids got to enjoy plenty of the sunshine in between lessons, though.

Elderly Lady wants to go to class again in the morning.  She plans to eventually ride transit to the gym, but she was too shy to right now.  I am happy to take her.  She lives right on the way, and taking her forces me to go and exercise!  I need to get back into a regular routine of going to the gym.  I have let my muscle strain discourage me.  Because of it, I can't do the elliptical, my ball/floor exercise, or any arm weights.  <sigh>  I do feel like I've made some improvements with my arm this week, though.  I've tried to make a real effort to lift heavy things with my left arm bearing the weight instead of my right arm.

Well, that's my recap.  Super exciting, huh?  Bet you're glad I didn't leave you out of this one!  :)

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Comparison Picture

I just hate to get my picture taken.  I know I mentioned this not too awfully long ago.  Not only is my body heavy, but my face seems to be one of the first places to show a gain!  I have some heavy friends who still have a longer shaped face instead of my round shaped face, and they look awesome in their pictures!  I'm not one of those people.

I know I posted a selfie of myself in my piled-up living room the other day.  I wasn't ashamed to post that picture.  Yes, I'm still heavy, but my face didn't have 5 chins hanging from it.  LOL

My husband has been saying over the last little while, "You look like you're losing inches."  Now lately, I haven't been very faithful to exercise.  At least not for the last 3 weeks.  But I have noticed a couple of my knit skirts keep having to be yanked up during the day because they start riding lower.  When I get really confident, I'll wear button-up skirts again.  Ha!

So I'm sitting here right now writing on pictures that I've had printed that range back to October of 2014.  In November, my husband preached a revival.  I made friends with a lady there, also named Staci but spelled differently.  She wanted to take pics of us together and our kids together the last night.  She is a breast cancer survivor, by the way, even at her young age!!!  She used to be heavy herself, but she lost weight with WW several years back and has kept it off.  I remember dreading to have my picture taken, but I smiled anyway.

This was the result, and I have LOATHED this picture.  Oh, my face!  The double chin is very obvious, and my poor eyes barely have room to open from the heaviness of my cheeks.  This has been a most-hated picture!

While writing on it just now, I realized my face didn't look nearly that heavy in my selfie from the other day (thank heavens).

Who knows.  Maybe it is just a difference in camera angle.  I know that can definitely make a difference.  Perhaps I am not smiling as big.  Regardless, it gave me motivation to keep up with the exercise because maybe, just maybe, my body really is responding to it ever so slightly and will continue to do so!